Christmas Alone

My mother and sister left me a paper Christmas tree and a few things to open on Christmas day. That was ever so nice of them. Despite any sentiments I may have voiced earlier, I am really glad they came to visit. Now I face the prospect of a Christmas alone, my very first Christmas celebrated by myself, with myself.

It may sound sad, but I'm really enjoying it so far. I have certainly loved the Christmas times with my family, but something about being alone in this house for Christmas is… I don't know, it's new, it's not stressful, it's quite enjoyable. I am ever so glad, of course, that the internet is at my disposal so I may let those I love know I'm thinking about them. But I suppose my gift to myself this Christmas is giving myself some time. Time to think, to smile, to relax, to cook and draw. That's really what my whole trip has been, but a nice reminder is good always good.

Even here in Mexico they cannot escape the crash American commercialization of Christmas. But there is something different about being here rather than America. There is a care and support for family here in Mexico that seems to stretch throughout the year, and is not simply hoisted upon us as some otherworldly responsibility to be paid in massive quantities of expensive gifts. Indeed, Mexicans rarely leave their families and tend to have the support structure of relatives throughout their lives. While I personally really like the American ambition (or is that disfunction?) of moving about quite a bit, as my life tus far has been a testament to, there is something comforting and unexplainably nice about the way Mexicans don't feel a need to distance themselves from their families. America is not just ripe with racism and sexism, but ageism as well. The posadas I have been to and the families I have encountered emit a sense of goodwill and loving care. Certainly many have their problems, just as any family does, but they stick together where American families pull apart. And part of this is exemplified in the way we Americans have turned the family image into a responsibility rather than a joy.

I would feel I was remise if I didn't take an opportunity to point out the strange morphing our modern traditions have undergone. Though we think of this as a Christian holiday, many educated people know that this holiday was pagan in origin. Many people have a lot of doubts as to whether Jesus was even born in winter, let alone December. But as Christianity gained favor across the world, many of the world's festivals were absorbed by it, as was the case with Christmas. The Yule was the celebration of the winter solstice by the Germanic people of Europe. Often it involved sacrifices for a bountiful new season and consisted of 12 days of feasting. While toasts and sacrifices were made to gods like Odin, it could be argued that this celebration had little to do with religion and was more commonly seen as a gathering of people in midwinter to lighten the load of their dreary weather. The word Yule comes from Anglo-Saxon roots, in the Gothic and Old English languages. An Old Norse text "Ynglinga Saga" first mentions a Yule celebration taking place in 840 A.D. Around this time King Haakon I brought Christianity to Norway from Rome, and melded the two celebrations of Christ's birth and the Yule in order to bring people together and convert them to Christianity. Check out the Wikipedia page, it's fascinating.

However you choose to celebrate midwinter, I would hope it's filled with love and joy, and not polluted with capitalist fascinations. I will be taking some time to delve into myself and contemplate the things that bring us all together, even though I will be alone.